Posted in Uncategorized

Fire and Smoke

I am consumed by the fire. Burning hot embers inside me explode. Smoke fills my vision. My mouth is dry. My lips are blazing. My eyes are teary. I am burning.

My body is loose. My hands begin to waver. My view is foggy. I am not sure if I am able to sense the world outside. The outlines of my body seem to be merging with everything else in my physical space.

I feel my body from the inside. My mind’s eye sees smoking black burning body interiors. It’s like the scene after forest fire went wild or the city doomed after a war.

My tongue, lips, mouth, lungs are burning with the intensity I couldn’t have imagined. I sit and stare at the wall. I am relaxed but I feel burnt.

I smoked… and I burned.

 

I take a puff. The voice inside me whispers softly, ‘oh, so cool’.

There is an inexplicable magic in staring away in space while holding a slender roll of paper filled with a mysterious substance. My fingers hold it softly with panache.

Peeking through the black and grey ashes, I see the glowing embers of the burning tobacco. With a light swift movement of my hands, I shake off the ashes. The embers glow with more ferocity.

Smoke rises in beautiful spiral clouds and fills my vision. Everything is blurred. I see my world through the fog. It’s gorgeous. The world I now perceive through this magical smoke screen is more acceptable to my naive idealist mind. The half visible reality is more bearable than the absolute truth. I smile. I exhale.

I can’t differentiate between my breath and the beautiful toxic smoke. I exhale. More smoke mingles with the cloud and whirls around me.

I take another puff. I swallow the smoke. With my mind’s eye, I see the same dance of smoke flowing through my blood inside my body. I am ecstatic. Every atom of my body joins in the divine dance. My mind rejoices with the thought.

In the very same moment, I hear a soft voice cry in agony, ‘oh, it burns… Oh dear’.

I cough it out.

 

I smoked… and I burned.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s